Unrealized Potential of our Pets

According to ASK.com 6 out of 10 American Families have pets.  That is an alarming number.  Most of us see a pet as a companion, something that needs us to survive.  But what if it was the other way around?  Pets can provide so much to our lives if we actively choose to participate in the relationship.

1. Friendship= Boundaries+Love+Time+Consistency+Mistakes

Even with reptiles people will place human emotions and personalities on animals they have regular contact with.  It is in our DNA to build connection and to bond with living things around us.  We are scared and hurt when they bite or run from us, and we are honored and excited when they appear to let us in.

Building a trusting and mutually beneficial relationship takes time and effort.  We are becoming more and more technology savvy and less and less aware of the real relationships in our lives.  To be a good friend you need to learn about one another.  You need to have time together and apart on a regular basis.  You need to put each other first from time to time.  We view pets as here for our enjoyment, and this is true.  However, in order to have a person and pet attitude we must set aside other things and focus on our animal friends.  They are not our children and do not benefit from being treated entirely like people.  They have their own "pack rules," and we should learn to use them.  This will take a lot of time and effort to meld human and canine together.  Are you willing to put in that effort?

First, you have to learn about the animal you have chosen.  Have you read about it?  Have you talked to others about their experiences.  This is where technology really helps.  There is all sorts of practical information out there.  Get involved and try to understand your animal so that you can know when and how to befriend it.  Most animals need for their owners to spend quality time teaching and rewarding.  You can learn so much by just watching your animal.

When you take the time to learn from your animal through its behavior and body language you will have the benefit of knowing its mood through movement.  This will make training easier in the long run.  It will also make you more aware of our differences.  I know that many people consider pets a part of the family.  Although I love my animals and could never live without them I do recognize our differences.  In this way I believe I make better decisions as a care giver.  I can remain objective about illness and longevity.  Animals do not choose to get surgery or go through lengthy procedures, we do.  So we need to make sure that their lives are about quality.  We skate a thin line when we keep them with us for selfish reasons.  Love your pet and make it about them not you.

When I first got my chinchilla I sat for hours with my hand sitting inside her cage.  It was excruciating.  I wanted to hold her and cuddle.  She wanted nothing to do with me.  It took months for her to trust me.  I had taken for granted how big I was to her.  She was born a prey animal and reacted as if I was a predator.  If I had not done my research and taken the time to understand her point of view I could have ruined the training and our relationship.  Instead of grabbing for her I waited and after 10 years of working with her she has never been better.  She has never bitten anyone, and travels all over meeting new people with me.

Next, you need to put your education into practice.  You have to be willing to try things, mess up, and try again.  Most relationships have their ups and downs.  Your animal is going to disappoint you, get mad at you, and hopefully forgive you.  Knowing how to react will save you time and medical bills.  What is the best practice for handling a snake? Feeding, shedding, and temperature all play into it.  Are you aware of your dog when you are out on a walk, or are you listening to music, on the phone or talking to a friend?  How can the relationship grow if you do not set aside time and practice what you took the time to learn?

My dog, Baxter, was a 9 month old boxer puppy when I found him on craigslist.  I was so excited and all I wanted to do was sleep with him and hug him.  I worked on walking and running with him and he was getting better.  However, all the sudden he started digging holes in the backyard.  I was furious.  I did not know what to do.  So I asked other trainers and researched it online.  I read that it was a boredom response.  Even though I was spending a lot of time with him I was not getting him enough exercise or stimulation.  So I had to change the routine.  I had to sacrifice some of my life for his.  I do not consider myself selfish, but I really just wanted my dog to get it.  I did not want to have to work at it.  But life is not easy and getting an animal makes a lot of work.  The pay off is definitely worth it.

Last, for now, only one person should be responsible for an animal.  There is only one alpha.  There is only one main handler.  If you create consistency the animal will react better in all ways.  One person should make the rules that are followed by all.  How would you feel if you walked into a room and everyone in it told you a different way to the bathroom?  You would be confused and concerned, rightly so.  Anyone thrives on consistency.  How many best friends do you have?  The ones that you want to be completely honest with you and you go to for advice?  My guess is maybe 2.  We do not want a lot of differing opinions.  We want consistency and support.  So does the animal.  If everyone in your 4 person family treats the animal differently it will inevitably feel confused and scared.

My dog Ricky was abused as a puppy.  It was important for him to be loved.  I because his protector through our constant training.  I remained in control of the people around him and he trusted me.  I spent hours on commands and training to get him comfortable with hand signals and encouragement.  He did not need discipline he needed a quiet and firm encouragement.  I bended to meet his needs and kept my distinction as alpha with my consistency.  I did not "baby" him.  I did not force him.  I let him develop at his own pace, and encouraged every step.